Friday, October 8, 2010

1997 was a very good year.




 


I had a good ten years.  I was really healthy between 22 and 29.  Ok.  I had a good seven years.  Before 22 I got migraines all the time.  At 29, I got pregnant and well, my body has never been the same.  After my second pregnancy, I got plantar fascitis, after my third pregnancy I got a tumor, and then finally, I thought I was done.  I was getting more energy and I was feeling happy and life was getting good for almost a month and then I got the stomach flu, which led into a horrendous 3-week chest cold, which has led to a week of migraines.  I have had four this week and I am bitter.

When you get migraines, people ask you if you are stressed.  My answer to that is yes.  I am incredibly stressed I AM GOING TO GET A MIGRAINE.  But now I am paranoid too so I am reading what the Mayo Clinic says I should do.  I have to stay away from processed foods and caffeine.  They might as well tell me to die or stop eating.  EXCEPT fasting can cause migraines.  I have been sleeping the week away from the medication I have taken until I found out that over sleeping could cause migraines.  But so can too little sleep.  So how does that work?  I need to take up yoga and there are some herbs I can take. 

Causes of migraines?
            Being a woman    check
            Being between 30 and 40    check
            Having a family history    check and thank you once again mom
            Experiencing hormone changes    check although I question this because I have been off my meds since November so I would think I would have gotten these earlier.

So the Mayo Clinic’s risk factors are stupid because I have all of them.  I guess the question should be, why haven’t I gotten them before this week?  The answer is that the Gods, especially Zeus, loved me and now something has happened.  I’m not sure what.  I would burn incense to get in better favor but certain strong scents can trigger them.  (Notice I said strong.  Not any old scent.  It has to be REALLY REALLY strong.)  In other words, please continue to use deodorant soap after mowing the lawn.

And to add to it, I thought I would get pizza tonight as a treat.  My kids ate a little but not too much because they had asked my neighbor to cook them dinner.  My kids are begging for food.  Just because she is from China and everything I have ever had of hers has been amazing, this is not a good reason to be begging for food.  And now my son is throwing up in the bathroom.  I’m not going to help him, because that will probably cause a migraine.  (Or I will throw up too)  And you already know I am not a good mom because my kids won’t eat the pizza I made or bought them.

I wonder if this has anything to do with the funny taste in my mouth.  Because I also just found out that I have a higher likelihood for a stroke.  Explain to me why I care about high cholesterol or being obese when I could die?  Pass me another donut, but not the chocolate ones.  Chocolate causes migraines

No comments: