Thursday, September 24, 2009

So four years ago I taught a class at Carroll College. I made very little money after paying for the babysitter and I thought, what would I like to do with the extra money? So I hired a house cleaner. I only taught for one semester and yet, the housekeeper stayed. Odd.

I felt guilty and then I got a tumor and now I can get away with quite a lot without feeling guilty. Plus side to growths in the brain... I have tried many different companies and finally a friend recommended two women who we will call Cagney and Lacey. They are wonderful women who do a great job. But they are older women who are constantly going to the doctor to find out what ails them and today I noticed the handicapped sign in their car window. So they can't walk across a parking lot, but they can clean my house? I can't get a handicapped sign, but people who can are doing work for me? Should I feel bad about this? At least I'm helping the economy, right?

I do pick up 80% before they come so they only have to do the heavy scrubbing. I put the clean sheets out for them to make it easier to change the sheets. I bought a new vaccuum to make it glide easier. I bought some nice cleaner. I clean my house throughout the week so it isn't too disgusting... Although I have no recollection of sweeping the kitchen at all this week. That is just not good housekeeping. Which is why I need someone to come in and do it. Right?

Maybe to make me feel better, for Christmas I'll get them each walkers.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009


This was the picture of the summer and the event of the summer:
I went to NYC with two friends. They left two hours before me and I thought: "I'll get a pedicure because it was in NYC that I fell in love with pedicures." It was a lovely experience and very relaxing before I got back to reality. A week later, I noticed my toe nails getting thick and pulling away from the cuticle and I was diagnosed with a fungus. I am not taking 2 pills every day for one week for every month for 6 months. I am no longer relaxed. I remember when we lived in NYC, there was a huge news piece about nail salons giving people fungi, but I never had had a problem. Maybe I had developed immunity that I lost in Montana. All I know is that I have not had such ugly toenails in a LONG time. Stupid New York.

Cindy Lauper Hair

I left for an evening. I woke up the next day and noticed something different about Katherine's hair.
"What happened to your hair?"
"Seth cut it."
"I wanted to look more like a puppy."
I then spent $20 getting it fixed. I know that is a lot for a little girl's hair cut, but her hair is "her one true beauty..."

Friday, September 18, 2009

Princess in training

OK. This is a call to all. Now I haven't spoken to Kevin yet, but that is the last step in my decision making process. I want to start training for Disney's Princess Half Marathon
It is the middle of March in Florida. I'm not sure how it will work and disneyland has a marathon which would be more convenient, but it isn't a Princess marathon. the weekend is dedicated to princesses and I could order a tshirt for running that says, "Princess in training." so if people would do this with me, I would be more able to convince Kevin.


Monday, September 14, 2009

Professional Organizer

If you want to feel like a complete idiot, hire a professional organizer.
You will say, "Nobody puts anything back."
She will say, "Why not label where it goes?"
You will say, "It is hard to find my clothes with Kevin's."
She will say,"Why not segregate the closet so you never mix again?"
You will say, "I don't have enough room for my kid's clothes."
She will say, "Then your kids have too much clothing."
You will say, "My laundry is never done."
She will say, "Then your kids have too much clothing."
You will say, "My kids don't put their clothes away."
She will say, "Then put them out in ways they can see where they go. Lower shelves or rods so they can reach them."
(You thought it was going to be about having too much clothing, didn't you?)
You will say, "My husband has no idea where the clothes hamper is."
She will say, "Watch where your husband throws his clothes. Put a hamper there. Move it a foot a week until it is where you want him to throw his clothes. They usually don't realize it is happening."

Most of the things she has told me are obvious. "If there are 10 throw blankets out, there will be 10 throw blankets out. If there are 4 out, you will only be folding 4." "If you own less, you put less away." "If you know where your finances are, you will never be audited."
Ok, the last one was mine. The hardest part is upkeep and staying ahead of it all. I am also minimizing meals.
I have chosen 28 meals and I am sticking to 28 meals. I buy the food for those meals and nothing else. That way I can rotate food storage and never have to think about what I am cooking again. This idea came from Marie Ricks and House of Order. She has a good website...
Now please excuse me. I have to go grocery shopping and buy only what I plan on eating. Novel, novel idea.

Food Storage

I just cleaned out my pantry.
I found 7 bags of powdered sugar.
I found 12 random fruit snacks bags.
I found hot sauce from New Orleans.
I found 3 bags of split peas my husband bought 18 months ago because he wanted split pea soup.
I found 11 cans of kidney beans because my husband found them on sale.
I found that I need a recipe for 24 cans of diced tomatoes before they all go bad Dec '09.
I found where the smell might be coming from... a potato was growing up the wall of the pantry.

I found that if I were to invite myself over for dinner, I don't think I would come. Because although one smell is gone... I can still smell another. I'm not sure what I can clean next.

And this is a good week for me to go on my detox plan. Kevin hates it if I throw out canned food. He calls it food storage. I try and convince him that we have monthly lessons in relief society about ROTATING food storage, but he doesn't get it. I think he believes if it is bottled or canned, it will last for eternity. I blame his father. SO the compromise has been that everything I am throwing away or giving to food share goes into a bin. Whatever is not gone by the end of the week, is thrown or given away. (Except the can of fiber I don't remember purchasing. He has a whole month to go through that - plus with the 12 cans of beans, I doubt he will need it for a while.)

So far... 1 can of 2 yrs expired pears have been eaten by my 2 year old. It's been 10 minutes and he is still alive.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Cutting Boards

So a month ago I bought colored cutting boards, but didn't assign the colors to anything. In my mind I thought blue for fish, green for veggies, red for beef and yellow for chicken. I just used the red for chicken and the blue for veggies and I realized I used the red for fruit on Friday. So I have changed my mind. I have decided that I need enough cutting boards to cut different things per evening and then put the cutting boards in the dishwasher and deal with it. I have more important things to do, like organize.

I wonder if in a month, I will be saying the same things about my medicine bins, laundry bins, and the loonie bin.

Tomorrow I meet the professional organizer... I will let you know how it goes. (She asked me who I have on my 'team'. I said a 6 yr old, 4 yr old, 2 yr old and a husband. So I am virtually alone.)

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

deja vu

So I was organizing my kitchen today and throwing away everything and donating a couple things when I realized I had just recently done all of this. I remember writing about organizing my house so that the closets looked amazing but the floors were out of control. Why am I organizing again when I already did? Why am I not still organized?

This time I am doing more. I bought bins for my laundry room so that my sheets are in bins instead of trying to stack them better. I threw away the nasty towels we got as wedding gifts that I never threw out because our names are on them. I filled our garbage bin full of crap. I bought drawer organizers so now I know what is in my "kitchen" drawer. I threw spices away that I couldn't think of a recipe for off the top of my head. I put all my medicine I use in a tiny bin that fits in the cupboard and I threw out the baggy that was full of white pills. I think they were tylenol and I might find out next time Kevin takes the kids to his parents and I am not responsible for 3 other lives or required to pick someone up from school. Wanna come?

I have decided that less is more and instead of just putting stuff away, I am getting rid of stuff. Whenever I say to myself, "but I might need them if it rains on the second Tuesday of the fourth month of the year of the rooster," I donate it. I have decided to give away every wedding gift I have that I have not yet used.

Then I am remodeling. I believe construction will begin next spring. I think it will take me that long to figure out how to remodel. Do I need an architect? Do I just hire a builder? Then what? What color walls do I want? What floors? Can I make my laundry room bigger? Can I put a bed in there for my house elf whose job it is to do laundry all day and put it away? How big must a house elf bed be? Can't he just use a cupboard?

And then I will put everything back into my kitchen that I have just organized and organize it again.

But after I do this organizing, I will not organize again. I refuse. That is why I have contacted a professional organizer so that someone else can do it for me.